How to dance in the rain.

I got this today in my mailbox and since the mood for love is still in the air, I might as well share this with all of you.

I'd have to thank my uncle for forwarding this tho.

 

 

 

'I was a busy morning about 8.30 when an elderly gentleman in his 80s arrived to have stitches removed from his thumb.

He said he was in a hurry because of another appointment at 9.00am. I took his vital signs and had him take a seat knowing it would be over an hour before someone would be able to see him.

I saw him looking at his watch and decided since I was not busy with any other patient I would evaluate his wound.

On exam it was well healed, so I talked to one of the doctors, got the needed supplies to remove his sutures and redress his wound.

While taking care of his wound, I asked him if he had another doctor's appointment this morning, as he was in such a hurry.

The gentleman told me no, that he needed to go to the nursing home to have breakfast with his wife. I enquired as to her health.

He told me that she had been there for a while and that she was a victim of Alzheimer's disease.

As we talked, I asked if she would be upset if he was a bit late.

He replied that she no longer knew who he was, that she had not recognized him in five years now.

I was surprised and asked him "And you still go every morning even though she doesn't know who you are?"

He smiled as he patted my hand and said "She doesn't know me, … But I still know who she is."

I had to roll back tears …'

… and you get the rest of the story

 

I always see this in movies, I wonder if it happens in real life…

Good Night Honey

Husband: Oh! Come on!

Wife: Leave me alone!!!!

Husband: It won't take long…

Wife: I won't be able to sleep afterwards…

Husband: I can't sleep without it…

Wife: Why do you think of things like this in the middle of the night?

Husband: Because I'm hot!

Wife: You get hot at the darnedest times…

Husband: If you love me, I wouldn't have to beg you…

Wife: If you love me, you'd be more considerate…

Husband: You don't love me anymore!

Wife: Yes I do, but let's forget it for tonight.

Husband: Please, come on!

Wife: Alright, I'll do it…

Husband: What's the matter? Need a flashlight?

Wife: I can't find it!

Husband: Oh! For heaven's sake, feel for it!

Wife: There! Are you satisfied?

Husband: Oh yes!

Wife: Is it up far enough?

Husband: Oh, that's good!

Wife: Now, go to sleep and from now on

WHEN YOU WANT THE WINDOW OPEN, DO IT YOURSELF!

 

Hehehehehhehehehehehhehe

p/s: This is purely meant to be a joke and not meant to be offensive.

ANCIENT WRITINGS FOUND IN CAVE

Written across the wall of the cave were the following symbols:

It was considered a unique find and the writings were said to be at least 3000 years old! The piece of stone was removed, brought to the museum, and archaeologists from around the world came to study the ancient symbols. They held a huge meeting after months of conferences to discuss the meaning of the markings. The President of the society pointed to the first drawing and said:

"This is a woman. We can see these people held women in high esteem.

The next drawing is a shovel, which means they had tools to help them."

Even further proof of their high intelligence is the fish which means that if a famine hit the earth and food didn't grow, they seek food from the sea.

The last symbol appears to be the Star of David which means they were evidently Hebrews.

The audience applauded enthusiastically.

Then a little old Jewish man stood up in the back of the room and said,

"Idiots...

Hebrew is read from right to left... It says: 'Holy Mackerel, Dig The Ass On That Chick"

p/s: This is purely meant as a joke an in no way meant to be offensive.

Never laugh at at a Chinese man

A Chinese man walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the loan officer.
He tells the loan officer that he is going to China on business for two weeks and needs to borrow $5,000.
The bank officer tells him that the bank will need some form of security for the loan, so the Chinese man hands over the keys to a new Ferrari parked on the street in front of the bank.
He produces the title and everything checks out.
The Loan officer agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan.
The bank's president and its officers all enjoy a good laugh at the Chinese for using a $250,000 Ferrari as collateral against a $5,000 loan.
An employee of the bank then drives the Ferrari into the bank's underground garage and parks it there.
Two weeks later, the Chinese returns, repays the $5,000 and the interest, which comes to $15.41.
The loan officer says, 'Sir, we are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled.
While you were away, we checked you out and found that you are a multi-millionaire.
What puzzles us is why you would bother to borrow $5,000?
The Chinese replies: 'Where else in New York City can I park my car for two weeks for only $15.41 and expect it to be there safely when I return.'

p/s: this is purely meant as a joke and never meant to be offensive.

Old Man Syndrome

Two medical students were walking along the street when they saw an old man walking with his legs spread apart. He was stiff-legged and walking slowly.

One student said to his friend: "I'm sure that poor old man has Peltry Syndrome. Those people walk just like that."

The other student says: "No, I don't think so. The old man surely has Zovitzki

Syndrome. He walks slowly and his legs are apart just as we learned in class."

Since they couldn't agree they decided to ask the old man. They approached him and one of the students said to him:

"We're medical students and couldn't help but notice the way you walk, but we couldn't agree on the syndrome you

might have. Could you tell us what it is?"

The old man said, "I'll tell you, but first you tell me what you two fine medical students think."

The first student said, "I think its Peltry Syndrome."

The old man said, "You thought....... But you are wrong."

The other student said, "I think you have Zovitzki Syndrome."

The old man said, "You thought....... But you are wrong."

So they asked him, "Well, old timer, what do you have?"

The old man said, "I thought it was a Fart........ .............. But I was wrong, too!"

p/s: This is purely meant as a joke and never meant to be offensive.